Narcissism is as Narcissism Does.

M. Scott Peck in People Of The Lie said,”Narcissism is psychological evil on earth.” So lets talk about how this evil manifests. For the sake of discussion lets call our subject Jay. Thus if Jay is evil on earth, he can not really be thought of as typically human, and yet most don’t want to envision him as anything else. But when people insist on or hold him up to reasonable human standards of normal judgment and ability to assess and work with others, their is no interest. Those who expect him on a personal or professional bases to behave in the usual range of those who have preceded him, will quickly find that he literally doesn’t care. People aren’t able to fathom the severity of wounds by which Jay views HIS world. Even though the opening for him was created by the disenfranchised  allowing an “outsider” to get “in,” no one truly fathomed the deeply underlying abnormality they were allowing into power. Even though, he showed up consistently as such, and with appalling regularity.

It must be understood that Jay relates his life through a virtual mirror reflecting an image of the world that he alone is privy to. There is nothing in his mirror that depicts what the rest of us see or hold as reality. The virtual mirror he looks into every day has idiosyncratic images of the people, places, and goings on that are true only to him and there is no availability for discussion or discourse. His mirror is ALL KNOWING and ALL SEEING about Him. Therefore, everyone around him is either in the reflection of the way he sees and believes them to be, or THEIR NOT. On this bases, an “all or nothing reality” exists that has no wiggle room or availability for ANY DIFFERENCES. Thus, he demands not loyalty, which keeps being attributed to him by himself and others, BUT UTTER DEVOTION. Meaning that no matter how many times someone is supportive and or has his back, no one is above being scrutinized for the very next situation that arises. And God for bide you do not jump through the hoop according to the mirror’s reflection. Because if you don’t, the likelihood of you being ousted is imminent. You see, Jay can’t spell loyalty and he himself owns absolutely none of it. His loyalty lasts as long as you behave and speak exactly what it is his mirror demands. The moment you don’t, you’re toast. And if you doubt that, look at the ever growing  list of the “betrayers” regarding his mirror’s reflection who were originally “loyalists.”

He is, by the way, extremely prone to the agony/wounding of his mirror’s sense of betrayal. To his “all or nothing” reality of relationships you are either holding the image of his mirror’s portrayal of you, or your not. And if you are not, you are not only expendable, but he is absolutely sure it is your fault that you have betrayed him. No matter what circumstances have caused his wounded sense of “betrayal,” IT IS YOUR FAULT.  And make no mistake, you will burn for it.

Needless to say, this omnipotent reflection of the Jay’s mirror is NEVER to be questioned or even criticized. It holds HIS truth by ‘which no man can put asunder.’ This is also why he can not be given advice even by the people he puts in place to do it. Clearly, the mirror holds these consultants to be those whose only purpose is to give homage to that which the mirror holds as self evident truths of The Jay.

Additionally, when there is a reflection from the mirror of an event that never really happened, for him it is the God’s truth and can not be debated. Not only is it above question, but because it is in His mirror, he has nothing to apologize for because it can not be wrong or impugned.  Therefore, he has this blank look when he is called out on things that never took place because clearly the rest of the world is being duplicitous in wrongly coming after him. And they must be coming after him for “their” own reasons because he is never in error. Because again, the virtual Jay mirror of what is, is never wrong. Therefore, he can’t be and never is lying since all he sees-is. Therefore, an apology is unnecessary and inappropriate.

This is why it is so sad to me when the “hopefuls” hold out for some sort of “change due his dealings or waiting for Jay to do the mature thing. No one seems to get that this type of normal process is an impossibility with whom this man really is. Only a human being who accepts himself as a flawed individual and who expects himself to grow and learn, can. A normal person looks to others to offer assistance and input. Such a person has a board to offer experienced knowledge to guide their own judgment. But when ‘ you know more than the professionals, Jay has no gratitude for the assistance. In Jay we get what we see. Those of you who are hoping and waiting for growth and change must still believe in Santa Clause, the Tooth Fairy, and are constantly hit with the “love is blind” phenomena. Or, are surprised that you keep being labeled as the personified definition of  insanity, i.e. doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results. All I can say to you is good luck hoping, but don’t hold your breath because you will turn blue waiting for the impossible.

 

 

 

 

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