OMG, This is such a huge topic, and though I am not sure I am the right one to discuss this, it needs to be out there and discussed. Humility is one of three wise positions to take if you are going to make any head way to as Miranda Macpherson says, “relax the ego.” For truly ego and humility are not compatible, and do not exist in the same space. They may hang out to some degree as they trade places in your experiences, but they are not even distant cousins.

Humility is where you dismiss as much of the ego as possible to drop into the depths of self.  This deepening into that authentic place of self, allows us to relate to self, others and the world around us with truth and  gentleness. None of which are passive, but rather coming from a place of lovingly empowered.

When we can allow ourselves to be humble, it means we have done a lot of our inner work to step out of our way to not “suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.” Thus, the insecure wounds and triggers suffered and created in us are to a degree healed. Healed to the point that we are not set off by the egos of others trying to ‘get our goat.’ In essence, as the old Zen koan says, they shoot arrows and but find no target. None of  these slights hit home because we are not available to other’s power to hurt us. As Eleanor Roosevelt said, ‘no one has control over us we do not give permission to.’ Now typically, this permission is an unconscious one, but given up to others none the less.  If we are not turning over our power to others, and hold a strong sense of self and center, we walk in a humble manner with no attachment to other’s cruelty.

Too many in the western world hold humility in the realm of passive and weak because in a jungle fighting environment this is how its portrayed. As Jesus was quoted to have said, ‘the meek shall inherit the earth.’ He was also not talking about those who passively lay down, but instead to not be like the centurion warrior but walk with humility and compassion. To love thy brother as thy self. To do that one must relax the ego and embrace the divine.

When you walk in true humility there is a strong desire to relate in a true and caring manner and there is no openness to teasing, sarcasm, judgment, or shame. From this perspective there is no room for toxicity, only the purest of intentions and the desire to experience peaceful, loving kindness. Humility is a door that is open in a loving way to those who relate in this manner, and a tightly closed door to those who don’t.

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